The real story of Anna and Ryan

I love this picture of Anna and I. It was taken a little over a year ago, Leyton wasn't quite a year old and Anna was pregnant with Ryder at the time...

Last week I told you how Anna and I met... Today I want to take the time to give you the real story of Anna and Ryan.

It really did start at St. Joseph's College in Rensselaer Indiana in 2002-2003. Three of my roommates had a class with Anna, I think it was a Core class, but you'd have to ask her to be sure. That doesn't really matter, what does matter is that is how I was introduced to Anna Westwood! Over time they all made friends with her which lead to her and her friends coming over to hang out with us. It didn't take long for Anna to become the "it" girl on campus for all us. My roommates and I lived in a suite on the second floor of a dormitory that Anna, as well as almost every other student on campus, had to walk past every day to get to every single one of her classes. We would sit on our couch in our living room and watch out the window for Anna as she would walk past to class. Then we would scream out the window at her things like, "Anna Westwood, I love you!" Or, "Anna Westwood will you marry me?" Then like little children we would duck down below the window as if her and every other person walking past didn't know it was us professing our love for her.

Let me give you a little back story on me at that time. I had done a good job in my first three years of college creating a reputation for myself. I was a functioning alcoholic, meaning I was drunk most nights but was still able to get up and go to class, get my homework done and even make pretty good grades all the while. (I graduated with a 3.0) Along with my alcohol dependency I had gotten myself wrapped up in some other pretty ugly vices...

Back to our story. Anna and I were getting to spend a lot of time together as "friends." I had a girlfriend from home at the time, so to Anna I was a non threatening male. Since I had a girlfriend she didn't have to worry about me coming on to her... Little did she know that at this point I had fallen pretty hard for her. Anna was very tall, she was a college soccer player so she was in incredible shape. She had long blond hair and blue eyes! My favorite quality of Anna's though was that she was very head strong. She didn't allow anyone to push her around, she was very independent! I was sold... My relationship at home had been bad for a long time, so it didn't take long of Anna being around for me to throw in the towel on that relationship. After what I decided to be an acceptable grace period of being single I asked Anna to go out on a date with me. Remember, Anna was painfully beautiful, smart and didn't fall for stupid boys (like me.) But for some reason, that I credit God for, she did agree to go out on a date with me! Back then my roommates and I gave plasma for spending money. My mom and dad were shelling out a lot of money for me to go to St. Joe so I felt bad asking them for spending money. So the roomies and I found a plasma donation center that would pay us $55 dollars a week for our time. So twice a week, every week for three years we gave plasma for spending money. When Anna agreed to go out on a date with me I saved my plasma money for two weeks so I had enough to take her to Outback Steakhouse and to see a movie. We went to Merrilville to eat and see Anger Management with Jack Nicholson and Adam Sandler. Since I did a poor job planning our time we had about an hour after dinner was over before the movie started. So I drove us to the theater and we just say in my truck and talked. The date was going pretty awesome, conversation came easy and we didn't run out of things to talk about. We had built a friendship before this so we were comfortable with one another. Comfortable enough that we even talked about some heavy issues during that time in my truck. Then after a while of great conversation Anna took her opportunity to tell me, "if you want me to take you seriously and continue going out on dates with you, you need to get your life right." BOOM! She laid it out there, if I wanted to continue seeing her, which I did very badly, I needed to clean up a few areas of my life.

Fast forward nearly 9 years to today and Anna and I have been married for almost 7 years. (November 27th will be 7 years) I took Anna seriously that night, the feeling of having her next to me was a feeling that I cannot describe and I knew that I never wanted that to go away. I wanted her to be mine, I wanted to take her off the market quickly before every other boy at St. Joe realized what I had and tried to take her from me. I fell in love with Anna very shortly after that first date, and my life has been so much better ever since. Today I am a strong leader of my household, I am a strong and loving husband and father and I am a strong believer in God and Jesus Christ and what they did for me. I am strong in all those categories because Anna is constantly whispering in my ear, "you are doing a great job," "you are an amazing leader, keep up the good work," "I love you." Behind this strong man is a beautiful and strong woman who helped make me what I am today. You see 9 years ago Anna saved my life so that Jesus could save my soul and I am so grateful for both of those things happening. Anna still do this day is breathtakingly beautiful, my heart still beats really fast when I get around her. I love her so much more today than I did 9 years ago when we started dating. I have said it many times and I'll say it many more, when it comes to Anna and I; I'm the lucky one!

Here is a little love song (my favorite) for my beautiful angle eyed wife.

My family

I thought I would take a few minutes today and blog about one of the thing's nearest to my heart; my family. I have been very blessed in life to be married to Anna Cathleen and she has blessed me to two handsome and strong boys, Leyton James and Ryder Scott.



This is a picture of my beautiful wife Anna. I'm sure if you asked her how we met she would tell you a different story, but I'll give you the real version of how Anna and I met and began dating. Anna and I went to St. Joseph's College together for three years but didn't actually meet until the last of those three years. She was in a couple classes with my a couple of my roommates. Since my roommates and I were the "cool kids" on campus her and her friends desperately wanted to come over and hang out with us all the time. They were always calling and asking if they could come over... But seriously take a look at her, who would say no to her? So after spending quite a bit of time together we got to be friends and that led to her asking me if I would take her out on a date. She said she had a crush on me for a long time and really wanted me to take her out. Again, she's hot, so of course I took her out on a date! We went out to eat at Outback Steakhouse and saw Anger Management in Merrilville IN and the rest, they say, is history. She fell head over heels in love with me, and then I fell in love with her. We were married November 27th 2004, it was the greatest day of my life! That is the 100% true story of how Anna and I met and fell in love, no matter what she tells you.



This is a picture of our oldest son Leyton James, he's almost two years old and one of the two greatest things I have ever had a part in! It took Anna and I a little longer than we expected to get pregnant but after a while we finally did and Leyton is what we got! He is a very smart little boy, he loves to read and be read to. He is also 100% boy, everything he picks up turns into a sword or some sort of club that he can hit everything with. He has an infectious smile and laugh with just the slightest bit of orneriness behind his bright blue eyes. He loves to wrestle now and will blindside tackle you if you're not paying attention.



364 days after Leyton was born Ryder came into this world! It took Anna and I so long to get pregnant with Leyton we were nervous that it would take that long again and we were wrong! Ryder is a completely different little boy than his brother. He's about eight months old and he is my cuddly boy. Ryder loves to be close to people. Leyton is a little more independent and is always doing things on his own. Ryder is completely content being held by or sitting on the lap of whoever is near. He has the most adorable little giggly laugh I have ever heard. He is a very bright eyed and happy boy. Just a look his direction and he smiles from ear to ear at you. He is an adventurous eight month old. He likes to be upside down and will try to throw himself backwards and upside down if you're not paying attention while holding him.

That's a brief introduction to my family. Let me say this, being Anna's husband and Leyton and Ryder's dad give me more satisfaction than anything I have ever done in this life. If all I ever did was spend time with those three I would be completely fulfilled. It's after having my two sons that I know I was made to be a father and husband. I love to go through life with Anna and learn new things every day with Leyton and Ryder. God has blessed me more than I could ever write to you in this blog with those three. I very much look forward to living a long and happy life with my wife, and watching my boys grow up to be strong men who will eventually venture out on their own and make their own ways in life. So to Anna, Leyton and Ryder I love you three so much it makes my heart hurt. Thanks for loving me back!

Focus

I saw this picture on the internet today as I was checking ESPN at lunch time and I just thought, WOW, when I looked at it. I thought wow for many different reasons, the first being "that guy has huge forearms." It also struck me because, if I am being honest, I am a HUGE Albert Pujols fan. I am an Albert fan because A) he is the greatest baseball player of this generation and B) he is an incredible christian/human being (wikipedia him if you don't know who he is.) But I also thought wow because fundamentally everything about his swing in that second is perfect! His knuckles are lined up correctly, hips open, hands out in front, chin on his back shoulder, the bat is cutting the ball in half and the most important, his eyes are on the ball. Look at the focus in his eyes at the split second before contact. His eyes are on the ball and he is focused intently on his ultimate goal, drive the ball hard somewhere. If you watched the St. Louis Cardinals game last night you saw that the result of Albert's focus was a 4-5 night with three doubles and a home run. He was in the zone, and when a hitter is in the zone a baseball looks like its as big as a beach ball. Being in the zone though is a result of all of his hard work and the focus you see there in his eyes.

How often in life do we lose our focus on the important things? How often do we "take our eye off the ball? It's easy to do, life gets busy and we have a lot going on. But just like Albert Pujols in the picture above, if you put your eyes back on the ball, if you focus back in on what's important you can find yourself in the zone.

**bloggers note** I think the game of baseball is a beautiful game. I think a perfect swing is beautiful. I think a diving catch is an incredible thing to watch. A backdoor slider amazes me and good fundamentals when fielding a ground ball makes me happy. Seeing a fly ball off the bat, taking the correct angle on it, tracking it down and making the catch is a work of art. I love the game of baseball, and the playoffs are my time of the year. Since the Indians are back to playing like they did in "Major League" I am on the Cardinal bandwagon! Go Red Birds!

Cling to You

The music video above is by one of my favorite new rap artists, Trip Lee. I have always been a rap/hip hop fan but as I get further in my walk with Jesus I find it hard to find good rap music that's not dangerous for my soul... I have, however, found a few and one of them is the artist above. (Lecrae and the 116 clique are a couple others.) But I was listening to my iPod this morning on the way to drop the boys off at day care and then on my way into work and this song came on. I have heard it before numerous times and even would say it is one of my favorites. But this morning it's like God tuned me in to every word and the message came through loud and clear. The message is one worth listening to and paying attention to. To sum it up what he's saying is that he's going to trust in God whether the rough times in his life go away or not.

"...Lord it may get better but it may not. So when I pray God I pray I would trust you whether or not the pain stops. So when the pain falls, coming down like rain drops, I just gotta cling to you..."

I cannot tell you how many times in my life I fall into the rut of only talking to God when I want something, or when I want something to go away. I find myself now spending a lot of time praising God for all the wonderful things that he has done in my life. Asking God for help, asking God to make "the pain" go away and praising God through the good times are all part of being in a relationship with him. What this song is saying is that, even if I ask you for help and you don't provide it, if the hard times don't go away, I am going to still praise you. I will still love you and I will still sing your name.

"...Lord you know I'm hoping that my situation will switch. That you'll show me your amazin' by erasin' it quick. But I've noticed that my hope is in you changin' it quick. Instead of knowing you're enough I was chasing your gifts..."

Loud and clear this morning God told me to love him all the time, whether he answers me immediately or in his timing. Whether it's good times or if I'm struggling, I need to always remember that his love is enough. "In this life full of strife if my days get grayer I'm content with the fact that you'll stay my Savior."

Workin' Man's Hands

My dad often times makes reference to "workin' man's hands" when I'm wearing gloves to work on the car or do work around the yard. You see he has been a maintenance man nearly his whole life. He'll have 30 years in doing it for the same company this March. So over the course of 30 years he has acquired very rough and calloused "workin' man's hands." From all the years of gripping screw drivers and turning wrenches he also has the grip of a bear. They have permanent stains and scars from all the work that they have done. And although I have put in my time in the factory setting, 7 years in a fabrication department, my hands are not nearly as rough and calloused as his are. One year of working in an office in the corporate setting has taken care of that for me. I do have scars from growing up and some of the crazy things I did and my hands have the marks to remind me, but all in all I do not have workin' man's hands.

I think of my hands in a slightly different way though. I look at these hands and think about all the work that they do, not just the physical labor. But across the whole spectrum, the work that my hands do. My hands write a tithe check every week, they give money to every needy person I see. They lend encouragement to a friend in need when I put my arms around him for a hug. My hands hold my wife's little hands when she needs me to be sweet. My hands also hold my infant and toddler sons when they are scared. They shield them from anything that I think might be dangerous to them. My hands fold in prayer many times a day for a plethora of things that are on my heart all the time. They reach up to the Lord when I praise and worship on Sunday mornings. These hands carry out all the good and bad decisions that I make over the course of every single day. They open and shut doors to things that I should and should not be looking at, they control the remote and dictate what my eyes take in at night. My hands do a lot of work, and I try very hard to make sure that the work that they are doing is good work, work that lifts myself and others up. My hands are doing all the work that will help to define my character to others. All the work that I have done up to this point, that people think of when they say the name Brillhart. My hands are laying the foundation for the path that my sons will walk down some day when I am gone. Some day Leyton and Ryder will being doing their own work in this world, blazing their own paths and I hope desperately that the work that my hands have done make a wide path for them to start on. I wont always be here for them, and someday they will have to do it without me. I want the work that I have done here to help get to a good point to fly on their own. As I sit and type this I feel like I am just rambling on and on, but there is so much work that these hands do, and it is terribly important that I am making the right decisions with the work that I do. It is something that I take very seriously and am constantly trying to keep myself in check with.

When you look at your hands what kind of work do you see on them? Whether you've got "workin' man's hands" or "corporate hands" doesn't really matter, what matters is the work that those hands are leaving behind for others.

Saying goodbye

This weekend I got the opportunity to have breakfast with a group of guys that I had a bonding experience with a few years ago. Ever since then we have made it a goal to get together once a month and do breakfast to keep up with one another. Sometimes we did do it every month, sometimes it would be months in between breakfasts. This group of guys, me included, texted one another quite often with prayer requests for one another and even praises for personal victories in our lives. This relationship has gone on for about two years now. One of the members of our group recently joined the military! Joined on full time, he is going to be an American Soldier (a very admirable profession in my opinion.) This means though that our friend is picking up his life here in Goshen Indiana and moving to wherever the military tells him for at least the next 5 years, if not for the rest of his career.

So this Saturday we got to meet one last time for breakfast and to say goodbye to and pray with our friend. It was great to get to sit together one last time and talk about life. It was also great to get to listen to him be excited about this new chapter of his life that he is just beginning. We got to pray for him and send him off covered in God's word! As we stood outside of I-Hop and said our good byes it hit me that this could be the last time I ever see my friend face to face. Who knows where his journeys and travels will take him over the next few years. He could end up on the other side of the nation, or even based on the other side of the world. Then I even began to think, "what if this is the last time that I ever get to talk to him?" As life moves us in different directions it's hard to know for sure where we are going to land, where God is going to have us end up. I have spent a lot of time over the last couple years praying for and with this friend as we went through life together. I know that he has spent a lot of time praying for me and my family as well and for that I am eternally grateful for his friendship. I will do my best to keep in touch with him when he has the ability to communicate, but who knows where God will take him over the next few years or even decade. What I do know is that I will always keep him and his wife and children in my prayers and that bonding moment that he and I and two other guys shared a couple years ago will always mean a lot to me. I don't know if he'll get a chance to read this post and to be honest it doesn't really matter, but just in case... I will continue to pray for you and your family while you are gone. I will continue to stand in the gap and lift you up whether we get to talk to one another or not. I'll continue to pray for your safety as you bravely defend this country of ours. Thanks for being a prayer warrior for me, Anna and the boys over the last two years when I needed it. Good luck and God bless you brother!