IT'S A BOY

On Friday September 11th. Anna and I had the ultrasound doctors appointment. We got to look at our baby through the ultrasound and it was truly amazing. The doctor had her reasons for studying the ultrasound and that was to make sure everything she was looking at looked normal. She wanted to make sure that everything was proportionate as well as look for things like four chambers of the heart. She also saw the bladder and stomach and was able to tell us that the kidneys were functioning. She said that everything looked great! We also told her that if she was able to tell us we would like to know what the gender of our baby was. She was able to tell us, she is sure that we are having a BOY!

Since this is our first child we both had no expectations as far as gender. We just want a healthy child, male or female. To find out now and know that I am having a son sparks up all these fatherly feelings that I had never felt before. Now I know its a son that I can put with all these feelings that I am feeling. Now I can refer to the child as him instead of it or the child. I feel like the bonding process is starting already and we are still months away from the birth. The due date is February 5th and I have from now to then to continue my bonding with my son.

Please continue to pray for Anna and our future son as the pregnancy progresses that they both stay healthy and the baby continue to grow strong. Pray that Anna feels better every day and that this pregnancy be a tremendous blessing for both of us.

I'm a protector

The reality of being a father and all the responsibility that comes along with it has been on my mind lately. Soon I'm going to be responsible for someone who is 100% dependant on me for their survival. That is a role that I think I will thrive in, dependability is something I pride myself in. Responsibility is something I'm good at. I am a protector by nature. I have always been the protective type toward the people in my life that I care about. I have always put friends and family before myself, their well being ahead of my own.

When I was eight years old my mom and dad had my little brother, my only sibling. Other than the occasional beating he took from me, okay daily beating, I did my best to intervene on his behalf any time he found himself in trouble. I got into a handful of fights as a kid so that Steven wouldn't have to.

Now as a married man I have the responsibility of being the leader and protector of MY family. My wife and our future children are top on my list of things that I will protect now. I cant wait to raise our children and lead my family the best I can. Anna and I have been given a great template to follow based on how our parents raised us. More than that we have the example of our heavenly father. So if we can just instill those values that we've learned from our biological parents as well as the values that we follow from our heavenly father we will have done a great job.

There is going to come a time however when I wont be there to protect our children from possible dangers. I wont be there on the school bus someday when conversation goes to a place our children arent used to. I wont be there when our children are peer pressured by friends to smoke or drink. I wont be there someday when the pressure to have sex is brought up. The thought of these things could keep me awake at nights from now until the day I expire if I would let them. That is why the time we pour into our children when they are young is so important. The beliefs and morals that we hold highly will translate to them. That is why the people we surround ourselves and our children with when they are young is so important. I hope and pray that our children come to know Jesus as their personal lord and saviour at a young age. So when they do face these pressures at different times of their lives they are prepared and they know right from wrong and hopefully make the right decision.

Our pastor at Grace Community Church, Jim Brown, said in a sermon once that he wants the members of his church to be the type of people who will DEFAULT to prayer not worry when things get tough. In a time of despair we dont give up, we dont give in, we default to prayer and putting our faith in God. It's that motto that will help me sleep at night when our children are growing up.

Thank goodness

So the other day I sat down at my desk first thing in the morning and was going through my mail from the day before. I was opening a large manilla envelope that had some drawings in it that I needed to process some orders. As I was pulling the drawings out of the envelope I got a paper cut on my finger. (The above picture is not me, but it looked a lot like that) As I sat at my desk and clutched that paper cut finger with my other hand and complained, out loud, to the guy that I share my office with I thought to myself, "thank goodness I cant get pregnant." Anna tells me all the time about how I complain about the littlest things, and Ill admit Im kind of a baby when it comes to the small stuff. But I got to thinking about my wife and what she's going through right now. There was a time when Anna was about 9 weeks pregnant that she was AVERAGING throwing up 10 times a day for two weeks! Every time she ate, she threw up. Every time she woke up in the morning, she threw up. Every time she showered, she threw up. Just sitting at her desk at work, she would throw up. During all of this Anna very rarely got upset. She never got mad at her situation, she never cried. And Im sitting at my desk complaining about a paper cut. Now I must say that paper cut was very nasty and Im sure due to the sevarity of it I ran a serious risk of infection! That can lead to a loss of time accident from work and no one wants that.

Seriously though, I cant explain how proud I am of my wife for the discomfort and pain she deals with for our family. She does it with with grace and beauty and I find myself loving her more every day because of her toughness. We all know if this pregnancy were up to me to do, it would be a miserable nine months full of crying and self pitty.

Anna is over 18 weeks pregnant now, almost half way there! She is starting to show and looks radiant! Thank you so much Anna for doing this for our family. I love you and Im so proud that you are my wife!

Things are getting exciting!

We had our third appointment with our doctor yesterday! We got to hear our baby's heartbeat again and had the opportunity to ask any questions that have come up to this point. Our doctor found the heartbeat right away and it is an amazing thing to hear my child's heart beating from inside my wife. I heard it last month and was overwhelmed and again yesterday it was still just as overwhelming as the first time I heard it.

Our doctor also told us that within this next month Anna might start feeling the "fluttering" of the baby inside her. She also told us that about a month after Anna starts to feel it the baby is strong enough to be felt from the outside. Which means I'll be able to feel it! Anna and I are totally overjoyed by this blessing that has been given to us.

Also we scheduled the ultrasound for September 11th! Less than one month from being able to see our baby. At that time we have the choice of whether or not we want to find out the gender. We are still undecided but definitely leaning toward one decision. I wont put it out there yet what we are leaning towards, because I haven't asked Anna if it's okay to do that. So Ill update everyone when I ask. (I have learned how to avoid conflict). I think, just like hearing the heartbeat for the first time was overwhelming to me, actually seeing our baby in the ultrasound will be just as overwhelming.

God has truly blessed Anna and I with this baby, also with wonderful friends and family who have been more than supportive. Thank you everyone.

We heard the heartbeat!

We had another appointment with our doctor today and our hope coming into this particular appointment was that we would hear the heartbeat. At our last appointment the doctor told us that Anna was not quite far enough along to hear it. As the doctor was trying to find the heartbeat I was getting kind of emotional sitting in the chair with the thought of, "maybe we wont hear the heartbeat today." Or even the thought of hearing it was getting to me. Finally the doctor found it, and it was clear and it was strong and it was fast. About 160-170 beats per minute. It was such an emotional time for me as I sat and listened to my babies heartbeat for the first time. I cant begin to explain how overwhelmed I was at that moment. I cant wait for every new step of this journey with Anna and our baby.

Here's what I know

As we all know my wife is pregnant, if you didn't know now you do, and I am trying my best to figure out what it takes to be a good parent. I have searched countless hours on the Internet looking for "the new father handbook," I cant find one anywhere. I thought instead of worrying about all the things I do not know I would list all the things I do know about newborns and go from there. They are, in no particular order, as follows.

1. Babies do not love Buffalo Wild Wings boneless wings as much as I do.

2. Babies do not sleep for twelve consecutive hours through the night on my day off like I do. (Anna just told me about that one)

3. Babies can not get up and get the things they want on their own.

4. Once we leave the hospital for home, no one comes in and checks on me to make sure I'm doing alright.

5. The world doesn't revolve around me. (Anna just told me about this one too)

6. Because of all the times I have talked my friends kids into doing bad things, none of my friends are allowed to babysit.

7. Babies cant take showers.

8. Our baby will not think my DVD collection is as cool as I do.

And lastly

9. If the baby happens to be female, someday some boy is going to show up to my house and want to date her.

10. Due to number 9, I really need to work on my ju jitsu.

Distance

Josh

Chris

Travis

I'm not sure what got me thinking about the friends I have and how fortunate I am to be surrounded my such great people, but I thought I would take some time and talk about my friends.

In no particular order these are my three BEST friends. The first picture is Josh I met him in college and we were roommates for three years. The second picture is Chris, Chris and I have known each other for a long time but got to be very close in high school. The last picture is Travis, I have known Travis the longest he and I have been inseparable since our elementary school days. Each of these three guys have impacted my life hugely and I would not be the person I am today if it were not for the influence of each one of them.

Travis and I have been friends since what seems like birth but was probably closer to second or third grade. He lived close when we were younger, within bike riding distance that mom and dad allowed, so we were together literally every minute of every day for years. We had a summer as children where I only came home long enough for new clothes and to get some food and then I was back off on the bike to hang out. We used to go to the park and play basketball, we played football and roller skated, yes kids I was around before roller blades were the new thing. We stayed tight all the way through high school, I was there for his first love and first broken heart and he was there for me and mine. There were times when I was younger that I was my own worst enemy and Travis has always been like a guardian angel to me. He would never hesitate to tell me that I was acting like a real idiot. I have heard that from him a few times. Sometimes I fear how far I would have veered if it would not have been for Travis' friendship to me.

Chris and I have gone to school together since our middle school days. We have known each other for a very long time. We got to be good friends sometime in high school though, I don't remember exactly when. Chris has always been, especially then, a "good time" friend to me. Times when I needed someone to make me laugh, someone to bring me out the bad days I had or just to take my mind off of reality for a while. Chris was the guy. He and I share a lot of interests and opinions so there is never a shortage of things for he and I to do or get into. As we got older and went to college the boundaries of our friendship evolved along with us. He turned into a person that I looked to for advice. One thing you'll learn about Chris if you spend any short amount of time with him is that is in an overly intelligent person and is full of, to me, valuable insight. Even after college our friendship has evolved again as we get to be older. It is still the same as it ever was when we get together, we tried to kill one another with fireworks on the fourth of July this year, we can still cut lose and have a good time and put away the worries of adult life for a while and just enjoy our friendship.

Josh and I met at Saint Josephs College. I was a sophomore when he was a freshman and we met through mutual friends. It did not take long for us to realize how well we got along and how much we had in common. Josh and I have spent many late nights talking about our lives and hardships that we have faced alone and together. We realized that we don't ever have to be alone in those hardships anymore, there is a trust with us that allows us to be one hundred percent honest with what is going on with us. It allows us to get things out into the open that need to be talked about in a safe environment. Not to mention some of my craziest and most fun moments of my life have been spent with Josh. I have only known him for five years or so and have countless memories of he and I.

Now all four of us, Travis, Josh, Chris and myself are all grown up. We've all moved away. Travis lives in North Carolina, Josh lives in Dayton OH and Chris lives in Indianapolis while I'm here in Goshen. We have all gotten married, Travis to Amber, Josh to Penney and Chris to Jamie. Of course I'm married to my beautiful wife Anna. AND all of them have children now, and Anna is pregnant with our first. We have all grown up, we all live away from one another, we have all gotten married and we have all started families of our own. But now matter what's new in our lives with children and houses and moving and everything that each of us has going I know that all of those friendships are still just as strong as they ever were. I am blessed to be able to say that Travis is my best friend. I am blessed to be able to say that Chris is my best friend and I am blessed to be able to say that Josh is my best friend. I love you guys!